The Art Of Being Yourself

I asked a question yesterday, after reading a post on The Indie Byline. It was more of a statement, but the bottom line was, in fact, a question. “How do you go about loving yourself?”. I believe everything happens for a reason, and things are very rarely coincidences, so finding this post shared by Anee Uche while scrolling through my google+ page (something I hardly do) was the universes’ way of giving me a very satisfying answer.

Caroline McHugh doesn’t precisely address self love, but self acceptance. And to me, the two could very much be the same. She says;

“You’re already different, your job is to figure out how and to be MORE of that.”

“Superiority and Inferiority are both signs of a fragile ego. One of them is about a delusion of grandeur and the other delusions of insignificance.”

“There’s a third way of being in the world, I call it “interiority”. It describes a particular deposition, (1) its completely uncomparative. (2) it’s the only place in your life where you have no competition.”

“Needing other people’s approval, needing somebody else’s opinion and mistaking it for your own is one of the most debilitating things you’ll do on the road to being yourself.”

“Humility is not thinking less about yourself, humility is thinking about yourself less.”

“When you look at remarkable or successful individuals, I don’t mean monetarily successful, I mean people that are being successful by achieving whatever they set out to do. You find out that the thing they have in common is that they have nothing in common.”

“I have identified the thread that links them, these are individuals that have managed to figure out the unique gift that the universe gave them when they incarnated and then put that at the service of their goals”

 “People who are frightened of being themselves would work for people who aren’t afraid.”

“Your only job while you’re here, on this planet is to be good at being you as they (your role models and whoever you look up to) are good at being them.”

“You’re not just somebody’s boss, or somebody’s mom, You’re yourself.”



Featured Image: Mwinji Siame by Richardo Simal Via ContinentCreative

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  • Reply August 12, 2014

    The Indie

    Have saved this in my Watch Later and will definitely give it a look. Like you, I also believe that self love is self acceptance because I think that’s a part of love: accepting an individual and in this case, yourself exactly as who you are. I loved this quote: “Your only job while you’re here, on this planet is to be good at being you as they (your role models and whoever you look up to) are good at being them.” Comparison can steal so much joy and sometimes I have to remind myself more than once a day and I think that’s a part of loving yourself, being aware of bad habits and catching them through reminding yourself that you should constantly be singing a Bruno Mars song of undying admiration to yourself lol

    • Reply August 12, 2014

      Black Fabulousity


      I’ve watched this video about seven times already, because it reminds me of the side effects of comparism which is mostly self loathing. And for every moment I thought to compare, I remember “Interirority and how it’s completely uncomparative and the only place in your life where you have no competition.”

  • Reply September 17, 2014

    Angel Dureke

    I loved this , every word of it!

    Thank you for sharing this.

    • Reply September 18, 2014

      Black Fabulousity

      you are welcome! Glad to know someone enjoyed this as much as i did

  • Reply June 2, 2015


    Watched this wanted to read and see what others thought…

  • Reply January 30, 2016


    Caroline McHugh is my Role Model and Hero–and like you, I have watched this video numerous times. Meeting her on video was like finding the Queen of my tribe. Looks like there are many of us in this tribe of women lifting each other up and being the very best we can be every day. Thanks for posting! It’s a pleasure to meet you.

  • Reply January 25, 2017


    I think of this lesson of humility often. Not just for myself but also for others.
    I think I was slightly disadvantaged because growing up I don’t recall being told to be myself. But I always was. I was the eccentric child out of my three other siblings but where I was celebrated for being different outside my home, inside, I was ridiculed. When I decide to have children I think appreciating their individuality will be the my number one goal.